How to identify a tyrant man by appearance. How to recognize a tyrant in a man: early warning signs. He is concerned about your relationship

The first opinion about a man is often wrong. And the point is not at all in his ability to skillfully hide his negative sides. A tyrant man does not show aggression at first. After all, in order to dominate a woman and put her into a state of fear, you need to get to know the victim well enough, to identify her weak sides. In this article we will tell you how to recognize such a man and give some tips.

A little psychology

The tyrant more often finds himself a timid woman who allows him to regularly throw out all the accumulated negativity on himself. Next to him you will rarely meet a strong-willed person who is able to fight back at the first impulses of aggression. But if suddenly such a one was nearby, he would be affectionate and submissive, and all his negative energy will take it outside the family, for example, to work.

Perhaps you noticed that one man with different women behaves differently? He can beat two previous wives half to death, and with the third he can be timid, white and fluffy. Which means it’s not about him, but about you. You are the soil that allows you to attack and dominate. You are his irritant and at the same time recharge. After all, they do to us women what we allow to be done. If we do not stop the manifestation of aggression at the very beginning, then we give the green light to the enemy, a call to action.

Remember - men behave with women the way they themselves allow them to!

Tyranny is the desire to rule. This is not a character trait or a hereditary factor. These are complexes and grievances that have matured for a long time, since childhood. Often, tyrants grow up in calm families where everything was fine, except for one thing - the child was deprived of his own opinion, overprotected, imposing his own priorities.

Sometimes this is a manifestation of childhood mental trauma: bullying by peers, reproaches from teachers, or domestic violence. Children are a reflection of their parents. And if a child with early age familiar with daily family squabbles involving assault, he is likely to take adult life similar behavior pattern.

How to recognize a tyrant man before marriage?

How to recognize a tyrant in the early stages of a relationship? There are characteristic signs from which conclusions can be drawn. Here are some of them:

• Discontent- This main feature. He doesn't like everything, from the weather, idiot employees, loser brother, and so on. The tyrant reveals more about himself on the first date. And it doesn't matter what exactly. He is interested in knowing a little about you, most often - whether you are provided with housing and whether you have a decent salary. Because he doesn’t initially intend to support you. In a cafe or restaurant, such men always don’t like the service, menu, prices, and are annoyed by the waiter always hovering around and loud music. In such rooms he “suffocates”; he does not feel comfortable there.
• Greed. Almost all tyrants are stingy. A man who skimps on a taxi on a first date, offering to ride on the subway or trolleybus, is not at all frugal, as many believe. If you want to go to a cafe to drink a cup of coffee, and a man offers to take a drink from a nearby machine, be wary. Stinginess manifests itself not only in money. A greedy man is greedy in everything. First of all, in the manifestation of his emotions, which reveals him as a tyrant
• Jealousy. Greed always goes hand in hand with jealousy. The formula here is simple: if a man is greedy, then he is jealous, and vice versa! So if you notice one sign, don't wait for another to appear. Tyrants are absolutely always jealous, of everything and everyone: their boss, mother, child, neighbor, dog or TV series. Anyone who takes up even a small part of your time will automatically be blacklisted as a domestic tyrant, and imperceptibly their presence in your life will begin to decrease.
• Seriousness. Remember! There's no such thing as too much serious men. If he remains in a depressing state all the time, run away. He can talk to you for hours about family problems, a scratched hood or an upcoming contract, but he has one motivation for talking to you - to arouse pity. As soon as you feel sorry for him, he will immediately begin to manipulate you. Whiners aren't always weak men. In most cases, this is a hidden manifestation of tyranny.
• Shifting the blame. For a tyrant man, everyone is always to blame except him. He regularly shifts his problems onto other people's shoulders - in childhood on his parents', now on yours. As soon as you let a tyrant into your space, all his problems will become yours, and only you will be responsible for them. And if you suddenly fail, take the first blow!
• Lack of independence. It manifests itself in the early stages of a relationship. If you find out that your new boyfriend’s mother made sandwiches for work until he was 25, refuse the next date. And if at 30 he is still living with her, you will never be able to take her place. Anything you don’t do in the future will only cause irritation, followed by an outburst of negativity. The point is excessive maternal care, which deprives a person of making independent decisions, subsequently leading to regular breakdowns.

  It is useless to compete with his mommy - you will only cause irritation in an infantile man

How to end a relationship and leave a domestic tyrant?

If attacks of aggression have become the norm of life, you are not allowed to realize your potential as a mother, a woman, or as a specialist, the relationship must be terminated. However, it is quite difficult to escape from the hands of a male tyrant. The first and most important thing is not to prepare him mentally. It is necessary to act with lightning speed.

First of all, you need to prepare yourself. You must decide everything for yourself finally. Because a lot of difficulties may arise along the way, ranging from material to psychological. After all, tyrants, after a while, begin preparing for your departure. This is usually expressed in phrases like: “Who needs you at 35 years old with two children?”, “Who are you without me?”, “Where would you be now if it weren’t for me?” and similar.

When you start to hear something like this from your lover or husband, it means he already feels that he is going too far, and with your entire state you are signaling a possible end to the relationship.

If you decide to leave a tyrant, leave immediately after the next outburst of aggression, but do not warn that you want to end the relationship

What you definitely can’t do is leave for someone else. For a tyrant man, there are no other men in your life and, accordingly, his life. After all, you have probably already regretted more than once that you told him about your kiss with a classmate 10 years ago. A classmate has been on the blacklist for many years, after your mother, who warned not to get involved with him, your man.

You need to leave the tyrant after another outburst of aggression. Moreover, unnoticed, and not demonstratively, with the packing of suitcases. Such men are quite quick-witted, and if you don’t leave him right away, you will never leave. And let him not fall to his knees, begging you to forgive him, you yourself will no longer want to leave. With his entire appearance, the tyrant will make it clear that this is solely your fault, and you will live with it for many years to come.

If you are tired of such a relationship, do not be shy about showing his violent emotions in companies. This is your chance, provoke. Typically, tyrant men are a charm to those around them. After all, if you leave such a “noble prince,” those around you will not understand your position and your decision. Consequently, it will be difficult to find support in this matter.

If, nevertheless, you were unable to recognize the tyrant in a man in time, and for some reason there is no way back, there is a way out. As follows from the above, tyranny is not a character, but a psychological state. A state of guilt and dislike. There are factors that will help you avoid attacks of aggression:

• lack of fear;
• self confidence;
• Love.

No matter how strange it may sound, such men also need love. Give them what they missed so much in childhood - love and support. However, you should absolutely not try to please these men by provoking new breakdowns.

Don’t try to please the aggressor, don’t show him your fears and weaknesses

If you work, do not leave work under any pretext! Housewives are a favorite “delicacy” of aggressive men.

Tyrants can easily recognize lies and hypocrisy. Therefore, speak to them openly, looking them in the eyes, share news, thoughts, instead of demonstrating your fears.

If it so happens that your man is a tyrant, and you were able to recognize this, make him your friend or ally, ask his advice or seek support. As a rule, in friendship it is very loyal people. Stop being his woman. Just become his friend.

If you want to learn more about the psychology of a despot man, then this article is for you. From it you will learn how a tyrant gains trust and begins to control the people around him, causing them pain and suffering.

Greetings,

dear readers and guests of my blog!

Have you ever heard of Pareto's law: 20/80?

It says that only 20% of the efforts in any business produce the main result,and the remaining 80% is something of little value and insignificant.

So, I thought: it is quite possible that 80% of our life isempty, vanity, routine and only 20% is worth something and brings meaning.

And some don’t even have these 20.

Moreover, if such a person is surrounded by people who are actively stealing his life interest.

However, sometimes just one thief is enough.

Aimed, for example, at realizing the instinct of power, constantly controlling everything and capable of letting go of hands on occasion.

This problem is especially relevant for the female half of humanity.

As you already understand, this article is about who he is male tyrant.

It is a continuation of the previous publication:

« »

because they are united by a key problem - aggression in the family.

In this article I will describe the psychology of a tyrant, and in one of the following publications I will definitely talk about the main signs by which you can identify a domestic despot (you can read about this),

I will also present ways to free ourselves from his power (and more about that).

It is important to note that the topic of family tyranny is very closely related to such problems as: , negative life scenarios and victim behavior patterns.

You can find articles about this in the section:

By the way, let’s agree that the words “tyrant” and “despot” will be synonymous for us, otherwise we will get confused in the semantic nuances :)

Contents of this article:

Who is a male tyrant

Types of domestic tyrants

Psychology of a tyrant

Who is a male tyrant

It must be said that for our society, tyranny and aggression in the family is a very complex and difficult problem.

Many families suffer from the hostility of their husbands, from their constant nagging, ignorance, anger, bitterness, physical and moral violence.

The problem is complicated by the myth that the problem will go away on its own. But this is not true at all.

Read about this in the article:

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In short, then

A domestic tyrant is a person who strives for constant control and power over loved ones and shows extreme, most often unmotivated, aggression towards them.

As a rule, the tyrannical type of character of a man is formed already in childhood.

When parents, through their attitude, develop or at least stable neurotic personality traits.

It would seem that he just took it and left such a person!

But the other side of tyranny is almost always the subordination and powerful dependence of the wife and children on their ruler, the husband-father. This addiction binds your hands and feet, and it is not so easy to free yourself from it.

The victim of a tyrant almost always depends on him physically, emotionally, materially and financially. Most importantly, a tyrant husband does not leave you the opportunity to choose, or completely controls him.

Relationships with such a person are filled with the expectation of a constant shake-up: if something doesn’t work out and doesn’t go as it should, then you instantly get an explosion of anger and aggression.

Those close to a tyrant have very low self-esteem (this, by the way, is one of the basic reasons why it is difficult to leave a tyrant and resist him).

Close to topic article:

There are...

Two types of domestic tyrants

Type 1 is a classic aggressor, aimed at suppressing others through scandals and shouting. He can use both emotional and physical violence, skillfully alternating and combining them.

Type 2 is a respectable aggressor. This type of aggressor has a reputation for being caring and an exemplary family man. In his family you will almost never hear screams, much less see assault.

Just instead family quarrels and scandals, relationships in such families are permeated with caustic jokes, sarcasm, ridicule, and casually critical remarks.

The criticism of such a tyrant is almost unnoticeable, and his hostility and discontent are expressed by gestures, intonation and gaze.

Such families are dominated by emotional abuse based on humiliation and control.

What these types have in common is that they use guilt and fear as key tools to influence others.

At the same time, the tyrant husband tries to exhaust and weaken the woman emotionally; he arranges everything so that she always remains indebted to him and guilty before him.

How a despot ingratiates himself into trust

The tyrant conquers his victims and makes them dependent in 3 stages.

On first stage he surrounds his future wife care and love. That is why many women at the beginning of a relationship with such a person cannot discern his despotic essence.

As a rule, the tyrant takes upon himself all the worries about the material and financial support of the family. The wife can only manage the household, considering her betrothed to be an excellent provider and economic man.

Thus, the husband, who has not yet shown his despotic nature, puts his wife in complete financial and material dependence.

On second stage the despot begins to slowly isolate his wife from her usual environment, tries with all his might to protect her from relatives, friends and acquaintances, often manipulating them and provoking .

In addition, he begins to lower his wife’s self-esteem in every way, devaluing her in her own eyes.

Either the soup is undersalted, or the cutlets are undercooked, then she is of little use in bed, then she looks bad, then she has gained weight, then she has lost too much weight, and it is very embarrassing to go out with her.

There is no aggression here yet, so far it is only mild dissatisfaction and criticism.

Moreover, all this happens gradually.

So that the woman does not even notice how firmly she has internalized the attitude: “Nobody needs me, I have nowhere to go, I will always have to be near this person.”

In addition to low self-esteem, at this stage the victim develops a powerful feeling of guilt, even for something to which she has nothing to do.

On third stage , in order to finally suppress the already dependent wife, the tyrant begins to show physical and moral aggression towards her. Here fear becomes the main tool of influence.

At this stage, the life of the wife and children of a domestic tyrant turns into constant attempts to guess his mood and adapt to it. They are chronically anxious and afraid that something is about to go wrong, and they receive another outbreak of aggression and violence.

There is another option for ingratiating a despot into trust, but I will talk about it in the next article. And now…

Psychology of a tyrant

According to most approaches to the study of the psychology of power and submission, a man is a tyrant (yes ) are formed in childhood.

As a rule, his parents or one of them were tyrants. Aggression in the family domestic violence and humiliation formed in him and in order to compensate for it, as an adult, he tyrannies others.

The psychology of a tyrant is the result of a very strong and psychological ill health.

The tyrant is controlled by a powerful power complex designed to compensate for his internal weakness and .

Being weak within, he asserts himself at the expense of others through the use of violence, control and hostility. For him, those around him are objects for self-affirmation; by suppressing others, he protects himself.

There is another option for shaping the psychology of a tyrant.

In his childhood everything was different: quite wealthy family, kind and calm relationships. But the parents did their best to please their child, instilling in him that he was the best. This is how a narcissistic person with an inflated Ego was formed.

Now the world revolves around him, everyone owes him and is obliged to do what he says. And everything that does not fit into his egocentric picture of the world causes him aggression and anger.

Very often it turns out that a tyrant is someone who seeks to project responsibility for his life and guilt for his problems and life difficulties onto the people around him.

It is important to know that any tyrant has a conflict bubbling inside between what is desired and what is actual.

He is never satisfied with his life, he is always dissatisfied, and his joy is short-lived and mainly associated with the implementation of a power complex.

Female psychologist Marina Kabirova talks about what manipulations will help you recognize a potential tyrant in a man, and what “bells” you need to pay special attention to when you are at the very beginning of a relationship with such a partner.

The union of a man and a woman, in its essence, is one of the most magical aspects of life. In a relationship with a partner, we can reveal our most beautiful facets, learn new things, start a family and new life. When harmony reigns in a couple, even conflict becomes just a step on the way to deeper and more happy relationship. But in reality, for some reason, instead of the promised happiness, we often lose ourselves in relationships and feel not the best. Unfortunately, there are very, very many such unions. Unbeknownst to themselves, hundreds of women find themselves in the position of victim in relationships and suffer from so-called hidden violence. To an outside observer, such a union may seem idyllic. However, within the relationship, slowly but surely, one partner slowly “breaks” the other.

"I don't like your friends and family"

The desire for power and total control is one of the signs of a person prone to violence (no matter whether it is psychological or physical). Therefore, as the relationship develops, you suddenly find yourself isolated from your usual social circle and even family.

The sauces with which this type of manipulation is served can be different. Your man may play on guilt by telling you how much he misses you when you're not around. Or express your opinion in a rude and sarcastic manner negative opinion about your sister, friend, urgently demanding to reduce or even stop communicating with them. Or he harasses you with calls, messages and suspicions of cheating ( read also: “Abusers and sociopaths: how to recognize and protect yourself from their influence”). Every meeting with friends or trip to family becomes a test of strength and the subject of heated discussions or the cause of his bad mood. Another characteristic sign of incipient tyranny is the partner’s demand to coordinate all his plans with him, while he himself quite calmly contacts his close circle at times and places convenient for himself.

There is only one unconscious goal - to deprive you of your usual support, a human resource, and close your world and life on yourself, in order to receive your portion of attention at any moment and assert control over the situation.

Flexible value system

Partnerships, in addition to the joy of intimacy and love, also include a decent set of mutual obligations. We, as a rule, choose a person as a mate with whom we are united by some values ​​and ideas about life together. However, in the topic of psychological violence that interests us, the following happens. Those values ​​and rules of living together that were common turn into rigid obligations for one side and become very flexible for the other. So, suddenly it turns out that, speaking about the inadmissibility of betrayal, your man meant you, and not himself. And one evening it turns out that he can come home tired from work and be sad on the couch, but you must always be in good shape and radiate cheerfulness and fun. Gradually, such relationships turn into a kind of one-sided game: for one half, the burden of obligations continues to grow, while for the other, it seems to lose its contours and dissolve into thin air. No matter what you do, it turns out to be not enough and ends with new demands and constant dissatisfaction. At the same time, your own needs seem to cease to exist.

Down with self-realization

As someone wise said, life is a series various events. Some of them bring joy, others - the opposite. It is important for every person to fill their life with resources that help them rest their souls and become more resilient to life’s challenges. Some people like to embroider with ribbons, while others need to attend a piano concert or meet an old friend once a month. All these resources ultimately make us more whole, stronger and free. The manipulator is not at all interested in such a partner, so he will try with all his might to “de-energize” you. So, your favorite hobbies, as well as the close people who share them, gradually fade into the background, and over time disappear from your life. And along with them, you gradually lose yourself and what fills your internal battery with energy.

"Have pity on me, I'm the most unfortunate"

A tyrant is a person who will never find satisfaction. For some reason he carries in his inner world a huge emptiness or pain, which he tries to compensate for with total control over those to whom he is dear. So one more characteristic feature such people - constant complaints and dissatisfaction. When things go wrong, he always has someone to blame. And this does not depend on the scale of the “problem”: whether the faucet is leaking at home, or unemployment in the country. The speech and statements of the manipulator often show disappointment, sadness about missed opportunities (of course, not due to one’s own oversight) and deepest melancholy. They love to complain and talk about their problems. They have a hard time finding at least one person to whom they are sincerely grateful and happily tell about all the shortcomings of their former life or business partners. Unfortunately, there is a stereotype in many women that frogs can really be taken out of their swamps and remade into princes. However, statistics are inexorable - and people save themselves, as a rule, by at will and great effort.

Fatigue

And this is a sign that signals to you that you have stopped drawing strength from the relationship. Although this - to become stronger and happier together - is another goal of partnership, rooted in ancient times. The modern rhythm of life and the inability to cope with stress often lead to apathy and ordinary physical and emotional fatigue. But intuitively, each of us knows that relationship fatigue is a completely different phenomenon. In a relationship that slowly poisons you from the inside, sooner or later the manipulator's goal is achieved. You are de-energized and exhausted, you no longer feel important or trust yourself, your whole life is in some strange way built around trying to satisfy the needs of another person (

How to recognize a tyrant in a caring groom and how to live with a person who keeps the whole family in fear? Experienced psychologist Yulia Vasilkina advises.

Myself term "tyrant" pdressed in Ancient Greece, this was the name given to rulers who forcibly seized the throne. History tells of the cruelty, suspicion and tyranny of tyrants who destroyed those who could lay claim to the power they seized. But why the historical excursion here?

The fact is that all the signs of tyranny remain in such a small state as a family. It is there that the invisible tears of women flow. What signs can help identify a domestic tyrant? The most important thing is the desire for maximum power and control.

A tyrant husband is like a crowned person on a throne that he is desperately afraid of losing. And he uses a variety of methods to maintain power.

Three Common Ways to Maintain Control

No. 1. Total control

The tyrant sees his wife and children as something like puppets, and, of course, he must have all the strings. He must be in control of everything at all times.

Strict control over loved ones will be manifested everywhere: in the material sphere and in communication, in everyday matters, personal relationships, and sexual contacts.

No. 2. Depreciation

For a tyrant, there is only himself and his own achievements. A woman’s success scares him: she is independent and can leave the zone of subordination! A woman's efforts around the house, her appearance, mental capacity- everything is ridiculed and considered unimportant.

No. 3. Punishments

The tyrant is inclined to punish for disobedience. Punishment can be different: deprivation of something important (money, travel, leisure); contemptuous disregard; scandal with humiliation, intimidation and beatings.

How to recognize?

Is it possible to recognize a tyrant “on the outskirts”, during the period of acquaintance and courtship? After all, it is already clear that with such a person it is better not to bring matters to a standstill.weddings and common children. It's a pity, but this is not always possible, especially with smart tyrants. Many women note that the future tyrant seemed to them at first “the ideal man.” This is how a tyrant manifests himself during the courtship stage:

• often calls and asks how her beloved is doing, if she is tired, what she has been doing and what she is going to do;
• can give gentle instructions on how to dress;
• may be annoyed if she has to stay late at work (“You’re so tired, you don’t rest at all, you’re being exploited!”).

A woman, as a rule, is flattered by this: she sees in this care and responsibility for her. This, it seems, is the stone wall that many people dream about! Why is the tyrant so good at pretending? Firstly, you are unconquered territory for him. A best soil for conquest - affection. Tyrants, however, are rarely truly gentle. Their tenderness is unreal, as if they are giving you cheap jewelry instead of gold. But women at this moment successfully convince themselves that they are “just imagining things.”

Secondly, if a woman is in love, then no special effort is required to keep her. A woman in love is pliable: she willingly fulfills requests and makes compromises. In marriage, a woman begins to talk about her desires and expectations, and the tyrant cannot allow this.

Thirdly, women themselves live with “wide eyes closed", preferring not to notice what is not included in the picture ideal man ready to get married. Did he call her "stupid"? I just made a mistake and was tired. Already at the stage of courtship, she limits communication with her friends, and she is thrilled: “He wants to spend all the time together so that no one bothers us!” He likes to say jokingly: “Oh, I’ll punish you!..” - but the woman does not take it seriously.

It is not easy to identify a tyrant. But still, “any object casts a shadow.” The tendency towards total control, devaluation and punishment also has its blurred manifestations at the recognition stage. Therefore, do not rush to the registry office until you are sure that you have met your future husband properly. And, of course, do not rush to plan the birth of children.

The portrait of a domestic tyrant is correlated with epileptoid personality disorder. This is not a disease, but a type of personality development that prevents a person from adapting to society and communicating normally. The epileptoid type is characterized by excitability, tension and authoritarianism. Such a person is prone to periods of angry and melancholy mood, irritation with emotional outbursts, and searching for someone on whom to take his anger out. Petty neatness, scrupulousness, meticulous adherence to all rules even to the detriment of business, pedantry that pesters others - all this is about this type of personality. Epileptoids cannot tolerate disobedience and material losses. However, they are thorough, attentive to their health and punctual. They strive for dominance. In the intimate and personal sphere, their jealousy is clearly expressed. Frequent cases alcohol intoxication with a splash of anger and aggression.

How much a man will show himself as a tyrant and whether he will resort to beatings depends on the level of his intelligence and physical activation. A man with a low intellectual level will begin assault at the very beginning of the relationship, and it will become a constant background. A man with more high intelligence and ethical principles can last a long time. Highly intelligent male tyrants will not be interested in the topic of beatings at all, because their main mechanism of influence on a woman is a web of words.

If you look from the point of view of neuropsychology, then people differ in the degree of activation: someone has high potential, is fast, active, easily changes types of activities; the other swings difficultly and gets tired quickly. Both one and the other can be tyrants. The first ones, the active ones, are more likely to move on to beatings. The latter may not have enough physical strength for this: they will act with demonstrative ignorance and caustic words.

What to do?

In various popular articles, I came across a recommendation for victims of a tyrant: understand what childhood traumas caused him to become like this, discuss with him
(and more than once), and you will be happy. Will not be. A tyrant man will never accept pity from his woman. He will not discuss the traumas of his childhood with her, much less correct himself in this process. This is painstaking work, and only a qualified psychotherapist can carry it out, and only if the tyrant himself wants to figure out why he, so wonderful, remains alone.

Is it possible to continue living with a tyrant? It is possible, if this is not quite a “real” tyrant: there are some signs, but they do not always appear and are not very strong. Usually in such cases we're talking about about tyrants with high intelligence, good upbringing and, at the same time, a weak activation type (they lack neither the impudence nor the strength to “crush” a woman). If next to them is a woman of a strong type, with sufficient self-respect, then it will look like living with a boring grump. Sooner or later, a woman may get tired of this, and they will divorce. But it may take years and years until that moment.

If tyranny in a family reaches the scale of daily tears and worries, and even more so if there is physical violence, you need to run away. It is not always possible to do this openly, as this can cause physical aggression, even if there was none before that moment.

You should prepare for an escape in advance: collect all documents and valuables, find a temporary housing option, think through plans for the near future, write a statement to the kindergarten and school not to give the children to their father.

Some arrange an escape during their husband's business trip, others simply take advantage of the moment when he left for the country. Be sure to warn your loved ones about what is happening - they will be able to help and react if the tyrant suddenly starts looking for you.Sometimes you can just get by with a divorce if it is clear from the type of tyrant that he is unlikely to be physically dangerous. In any case, you need to separate for the period before the divorce. Of course, a divorce from a tyrant is an unpleasant event, since this is a person who does not tolerate material losses and insubordination. At this time, it is better to exclude direct communication and communicate only through representatives.

So…

If the tyrant is “real,” then in life with him you can lose a lot: self-respect, health, personal interests and desires, sexuality, beauty, vitality, social circle, physical and mental usefulness of children. And all in order to serve such a king, suspiciously and aggressively protectingsparing his “throne”. Really, you deserve better?..

When entering into relationships with men, many women hope for a romantic, wonderful life, but instead become victims of real despots. Unfortunately, male despotism is very common, but not everyone can be identified immediately upon meeting someone. Nevertheless, this type of nature and character still quickly manifests itself. Therefore, it is useful for every lady to know the main signs of despotism, so that, having noticed them in her man, she can leave him in time.

How can you define a despot? Firstly, such a man will never admit that he is wrong. His woman is always wrong. Therefore, he has every right to raise his voice, or even his hand, against her. Moreover, the despot sincerely believes that this is exactly the case, that it was the girl who brought him to this state. Despots never apologize, and even if they ask for forgiveness, they always remind them that, nevertheless, if the woman had not behaved this way, nothing would have happened. By the way, in order to know for sure whether a man is a despot, pay attention to the reaction of the people around him. If they all agree that the girl did something wrong, perhaps it really is her fault. But if people are clearly perplexed when looking at the situation, it means that the guy is a despot and it’s better to leave him as soon as possible.

Despots never change until they realize who they are. And this happens very rarely and before that you have to work with a psychologist for a long time. In other cases, they continue to stick to their line, being completely confident that they are right. For example, a despot will never understand or acknowledge the fact that it was he who drove the woman into hysterics. Such a man will be sure that she is playing to the public or is fooling herself. Also, despots love to publicly insult and humiliate their women. If a girl starts to cry, get offended, and accuse him of bullying, the man will look at her like she’s a complete fool and say that she simply doesn’t understand jokes and doesn’t know how to treat herself with humor. At the same time, a despot will never tolerate such an attitude towards himself, especially in public. Often, despotism is one of the character traits very notorious people. They assert themselves at the expense of others, so any criticism towards them is perceived very painfully.

Despots love to put pressure on their women through their appearance and any complexes. Such a man needs to feel that there is an insecure lady next to him, since such a man is much easier to manipulate. When a woman constantly feels like an insignificance, she is more obedient and protests less. That’s why despots never give compliments, they always see flaws, and no matter what the girl does, they still remain dissatisfied.

Communication with despots is fraught with complete self-deprecation and self-destruction. Therefore, if you see that a man fits the above description, leave him immediately so as not to turn into his unfortunate and weak-willed puppet with which he will simply play.